She even offered to entertain him on our behalf. My dad on the other hand could hear none of it. That night, he beat mum up so badly that she had to spend three months in hospital. This particular event left me wrecked as I loved my mother so much and watching her writhe in pain was more than I could take. Throughout her marriage life, mum knew no happiness. I therefore concluded that marriage was at best a sham and to this day, I still subscribe to that view.
Then, I mostly kept to myself in school afraid of discussing the happenings at home with any of my few friends. I just wanted time to fly so fast so that I could grow up, get a job and live a lone happy life. I swore never to get married. Further, I always considered myself an outcast of sorts. While many children...
During those times that dad woke us up to entertain him; he would abuse us saying that we were good for nothing. Most particularly, he was so hard on me claiming that I was a good for nothing brat who could not do anything right. Because of this, I always tried to be perfect so as to please him though it did not work.
Today, I could say that the events that took place during my upbringing effectively affected the way I view intimacy. With that in mind I have avoided intimacy like the plague. Hence effectively, based on the cognitive behavioral model, it would be fair to say that through my experiences, I learnt (cognition) that the only way to be happy was by avoiding intimacy and marriage life altogether.
